Preparations and Thank You's

After I came home from Texas and started having all of my chronically-ill-child PTS, I got messed up emotionally, but since starting a low does of an anxiety medication about a year ago, I found that orderliness helps me immensely.  Not OCD orderliness, but orderliness that offers a sense of preparedness.  I know this might sound stupid or even obvious, but it helps.  When you have no control over the big things, the little things make a big difference.  I am sending my son off to surgery in November with no idea of what state he might come out of it in or how long we may be in the hospital.  That's a big. damn. deal.  BIG.  When Clayton and I leave home, we have no idea when we're coming back...and it's not because we're doing something fun like backpacking through Europe.  And I can't change that, I can't control it, but I can prepare for the various scenarios and that makes me feel so much better about everything.  So I have been thinking about that the past few weeks and now I am starting to try and get things in order.  I have to get the animals in order, the house in order, finances in order and all of the little things that go into those and then I have to get everything in order that I need to take with me or have lined up down there like the Ronald McDonald House, etc.  Now, my point is not that all this preparation is a pain in my butt...quite the opposite.  All this preparations helps me focus on what I can do and not on the much larger things that I can't change.  All of which results in keeping my anxiety under check.
Now a massive part of this is preparing financially.  For this I owe three groups: Angel Ride, Jensen's Heart of Gold and The Clayton Benefit Barrel Race put on by my sister and her family.  After making the lifestyle changes we made over the past few years and the financial support of these three organizations, we are in the best place with medical expenses that we have been in since 2011 when Clayton got Cancer.  Something that would not have been possible without their financial support.  Heading into Orlando, Clayton's medical debt is finally manageable.  Now, that's not to say that we are out of the woods medically/financially.  Unfortunately, we have a revolving door of medical bills. But I cannot stress how good it feels to be were we are now thanks to those three groups.  The timing could not be better either since I have no idea what will be in store for us financially in Orlando.  Going into that situation feeling so unburdened is a huge gift.  There truly are no words sufficient to express my gratitude.

So THANK YOU to all of those involved in the groups that help to support Clayton and to all of the volunteers and participants!